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Thursday, March 23, 2017

Smart as a Whip, Sharp as a Tack

Smart as a Whip, Sharp as a Tack

What matters isn't how a person's inner life finally puts together the alphabet and numbers of his outer life. What really matters is whether he uses the alphabet for the declaration of a war or the description of a sunrise—his numbers for the final count at Buchenwald or the specifics of a brand-new bridge.

--children's television host Fred Rogers

Learn to say, “No,” and it will be of more use to you than to be able to read Latin.

--preacher Charles H. Spurgeon

While experiencing happiness, we have difficulty in being conscious of it. Only when the happiness is past and we look back on it we do suddenly realize—sometimes with astonishment—how happy we had been.

--writer Nikos Kazantzakis

Calvin: I'm a genius. But I'm a misunderstood genius.

Hobbes: What's misunderstood about you?

Calvin: Nobody thinks I'm a genius.

--cartoonist Bill Watterson from the comic strip Calvin and Hobbes

If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time—a tremendous whack.

--British prime minister Winston Churchill

We are not nouns, we are verbs. I am not a thing—an actor, a writer—I am a person who does things—I write, I act—and I never know what I'm going to do next. I think you can be imprisoned if you think of yourself as a noun.

--actor Stephen Fry

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.

--writer/director Woody Allen

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT IF YOU WANT A PET REPTILE

Turtle drawing
While reptiles don't need to be fed daily, walked, or even given much attention, here are some things you should consider before making a big reptilian purchase:

• Look into the diet of your future pet. If you get a leopard gecko, you're going to have to stock up on crickets and mealworms, while a pet snake might require a freezer full of frozen mice.

• Find out how big your reptile will get. African spurred tortoises can grow up to 231 lbs (105 kg), while Savannah monitors can grow to be 4 ft (1.2 m) long.

• Since they're cold-blooded, reptiles also need some sort of heating element in their cage and that could turn into a noticeable rise in your electric bill.

• Some people who own reptiles and sometimes the rooms where they keep the reptiles smell weird.

BEST QUOTES EVER ON TEACHING, LEARNING & EDUCATION

compiled by Michael Josephson, WhatWillMatter.com
BEST QUOTES EVER ON TEACHING, LEARNING & EDUCATION - Compiled by Michael Josephson
  1. A teacher affects all eternity; you never know where his influence stops. – Henry Adams
  2. What a block of marble is to a sculptor a ready mind is to a teacher. Adapted from Joseph Addison
  3. Children don’t care what a teacher knows unless they know the teacher cares. – Unknown
  4. The best teachers teach from the heart, not from the book. -Unknown
  5. Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn. -Benjamin Franklin
  6. Teaching is the one profession that creates all other professions. Unknown
  7. Remember that failure is an event, not a person. – Zig Ziglar
  8. The test of a good teacher is not how many questions he can ask his pupils that they will answer readily, but how many questions he inspires them to ask him which he finds it hard to answer. – -Alice Wellington Rollins
  9. Great teachers are passionate about what they teach and respectful of those they teach. – Michael Josephson
  10. One day with a great teacher is better than a thousand days of diligent study. -Japanese Proverb
click here to read many more!

Reunited in Heaven...

Reunited in Heaven...
Reunited in Heaven...

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

This should be us when dealing with President Trump and NAFTA

Canadian Light Source Synchrotron

-SASKATOON (WP*)
The Canadian Light Source (CLS) synchrotron is the biggest science project in Canada in more than 30 years. (We don't 'need' a world's largest coffee pot, dirty hoe etc... when we have the CLS Synchrotron!)
How a Synchrotron Works


The Synchrotron began operations in spring 2004 with 12 beamlines. Located in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada, the football field-sized, $173.5-million project is a unique national facility that will light the way to a new era of science and innovation for academic, industrial and governmental researchers.

This high-performance research tool will be used by scientists in a wide variety of disciplines for years to come. It will help Canada retain and attract top researchers. Take that, Dog River! (Spit!)

A synchrotron is a machine that guides charged particles, such as electrons, into an orbit. At the CLS, an electron gun sends electrons whirling around inside a hollow donut-shaped tube called an "electron storage ring. " Inside the storage ring is a vacuum. Almost all the air and moisture has been pumped out so that the electrons will not bump into molecules and lose energy. The CLS has two storage rings: an X-Ray Ring and a VUV (Vacuum Ultra-Violet) Ring. As the electrons round each bend in the ring, they are guided by powerful magnets and give off energy in the form of light. This is called "synchrotron light".

Commonly called a synchotron... incorrectly.

Click here for a picture.

*WP= Wizard of 'OZ' Press

Improvement!

Little Tommy was doing very badly in math. His parents had tried everything; tutors, flash cards, special learning centers, in short, everything they could think of. Finally in a last ditch effort, they took Tommy down and enrolled him in the local Catholic School.

After the first day, little Tommy comes home with a very serious look on his face. He doesn't kiss his mother hello. Instead, he goes straight to his room & starts studying. Books & papers are spread out all over the room and little Tommy is hard at work. His mother is amazed. She calls him down to dinner and to her shock, the minute he is done he marches back to his room without a word and in no time he is back hitting the books as hard as before. This goes on for sometime, day after day while the mother tries to understand what made all the difference.

Finally, little Tommy brings home his report card. He quietly lays it on the table and goes up to his room and hits the books. With great trepidation, his mom looks at it and to her surprise, little Tommy got an A in math. She can no longer hold her curiosity. She goes to his room and says: "Son, what was it? Was it the nuns?"

Little Tommy looks at her and shakes his head "No".

"Well then", she replies, "was it the books, the discipline, the structure, the uniforms, WHAT was it?"

Little Tommy looks at her and says, "Well, on the first day of school, when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren't fooling around.

The end of your world...or time for lunch?


Scientists have come up with a computer program which lets you find out if an asteroid hurtling towards the Earth is heading in your direction.

The Earth Impact Effects Program will reveal whether you should jump in the car and drive for your life or relax and finish your lunch.

It will calculate the crater size, the energy released by the impact, and the effect on the surrounding area.

The program can be found at the Arizona State University website . Users are asked to type in their distance from the predicted target zone, size and composition of the object, and information such as impact velocity and angle.

Asteroids can be nearly a thousand kilometres in diameter and lie in a zone called the asteroid or the main belt, between the orbits of Mars and Jupiter.

For example: (Based on My Inputs):

Distance from Impact: 3000.00 km = 1863.00 miles
Projectile Diameter: 1000000.00 m = 3280000.00 ft = 621.00 miles
Projectile Density: 1500 kg/m3
Impact Velocity: 100.00 km/s = 62.10 miles/s
Impact Angle: 90 degrees
Target Density: 1500 kg/m3
Target Type: Competent Rock or saturated soil

  • Energy: 9.38 x 1014 MegaTons TNT - the interval between impacts of this size somewhere on Earth is 3.7 x 1013years.
  • Final Crater Diameter: 10162.11 miles
  • Time for maximum radiation: 315.54 seconds after impact.
  • Visible fireball radius: 30860.2 km. The fireball appears 2337.9 times larger than the sun
  • Effects of Thermal Radiation: Clothing ignites, Much of the body suffers third degree burns, Newspaper ignites,Plywood flames, Deciduous trees ignite, Grass ignites. The major seismic shaking will arrive at approximately 600.0 seconds. Richter Scale Magnitude: 14.6 (This is greater than any shaking in recorded history)
  • The ejecta will arrive approximately 1021.5 seconds after the impact. My position is beneath the continuous ejecta deposit. Average Ejecta Thickness: 1022997.07 ft. The air blast will arrive at approximately 10000.0 seconds. Max wind velocity: 29916.8 mph. Sound Intensity: 170 dB.
  • Damage Description: Multistory wall-bearing buildings will collapse. Wood frame buildings will almost completely collapse. Multistory steel-framed office-type buildings will suffer extreme frame distortion, incipient collapse. Highway truss bridges will collapse. Highway girder bridges will collapse. Glass windows will shatter. Cars and trucks will be largely displaced and grossly distorted and will require rebuilding before use. Up to 90 percent of trees blown down; remainder stripped of branches and leaves.

    Note from The Wizard: These results come with ABSOLUTELY NO WARRANTY

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Can you see the difference?

Why U.S. Navy Seals are better than the ISIS Navy Seals...
but don't beat the Canadian Seals...

U.S. Seals
ISIS Seals.
Canadian Seals.

Click on each to see the best Navy Seals!

Jeffery Straker - The Wizard's Favourite Songs

Welcome to my Jeffery Straker video post!











Click here to go to youtube for more videos.

Click here to visit Jeffery's Official website.

How is your moral sense?

 Click here to take the test
Take the Moral Sense Test. Click above

The Wizard of 'OZ' - A.K.A. The ToonTown Clown

The Wizard of 'OZ' - A.K.A. The ToonTown Clown

Monday, March 20, 2017

Gay Masons ?

Gay Masons ?

Can a gay man be a Mason? Though there are many people who would say no, I say yes. A gay man can be a Mason. A better question may be "Would a gay man want to be a Mason?"

Besides the obvious, i.e., I am a gay man and am a Mason, there is nothing in the history of the Fraternity to say a gay man can not be a Mason.

There are other gay men who belong to our Fraternity. I have met some in person and some through the Internet. There are gay men in Canada who are Masons. There are gay men in the United States who are Masons. There are gay men in England who are Masons. And, I am sure there are gay men throughout the world who are Masons.

And, a look at the history of the Fraternity can reveal some amazing facts.


Do you recognize the picture above? It is a picture of Oscar Wilde.

Many of us are familiar with the works of Oscar Wilde, including The Picture of Dorian Gray and The Importance of Being Earnest. And, many of us are aware of the fact that he was imprisoned for two years for alleged homosexual activity.

But, did you know that Oscar Wilde belonged to the Fraternity and is proudly listed among "famous Masons"?

Oscar Wilde was raised to the sublime degree of Master Mason on May 25, 1875 at Apollo University Lodge #357 --- a fact commemorated on a Masonic First Day Cover:


A positive answer to can a gay man be a Mason can be read on Rt. Wor. Gary L. Dryfoos' excellent website about Freemasonry ( http://web.mit.edu/dryfoo/Masonry/ ).

As Rt. Wor. Dryfoos writes:

But no matter what anyone might tell you, there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING in the ancient landmarks of Masonry that forbids the membership of gay men. (Underlining is my own)

And from email correspondence between me and a certain Past Grand Master:

"Perhaps it would be prudent to keep this news to yourself; some of the members, may not accept this very well. Don't ask. Don't tell.". Some brethren asked me 'Why I was telling them this?' (that I was homosexual). I guess I should have listened to him (The PGM). But I don't like to have to pretend that it doesn't exist, (homophobia). It must, as I can not see another reason that only a few of my brethren have chosen to maintain contact with me when I moved away... No cards for when I was in hospital (for weeks at a time, I could have used a cheerful phone call, email or even a letter from my friends). No inquiries from brother's to find out how I am coping with life. Benevolence from The Lodge and certain members, have kept me in good standing, and that is appreciated, but why do I feel under restraint and unaccepted in and around members of my own Lodge? Is it just me? I may never know. I just wanted the brethren to know who I am, and being gay is part of that.

And, finally:

Masonry was supposed to teach you to drop your own plumbline and build true to that, and to respect the plumbline and the true building of others. Unfortunately, in my experience, not all Masons abide by this teaching.


*The Majority of this article is from: Gay Masons - www.homestead.com/prosites-douglasmack/GayMasons.html

La Republique du Skateboard


La Republique du Skateboard > To launch the fashion brand VAGUE & LAME that takes his inspiration in the surf culture, director Neels Castillon shot all around Paris an impressionistic short film that is an ode to street skateboarding.

-Ostara-
May the blessings of Eostre
be upon you this special day!

It's time for Ostara, the spring equinox, which falls on March 20 for my readers in the northern hemisphere. This is a season of balance, of equal hours of darkness and light, and a time when we can rejoice in knowing that new life is returning to the earth. May it be filled with blessings and magic!

Eastre, the Goddess of Dawn and Spring
Eostre, the Goddess of Dawn and Spring

Ostara is a modern Neopagan holiday. It is loosely based on several holidays which were celebrated around the spring equinox (when day and night are nearly of equal length). The modern holiday does not have a strong relation to any known historical Pagan religious observation. A historically correct reconstruction is impossible.

Etymology
The name Ostara goes back to Jacob Grimm, who, in his Deutsche Mythologie, speculated about an ancient German goddess Ostara, after whom the Easter festival (German: Ostern) could have been named. Grimm's main source is De temporum ratione by the Venerable Bede. Bede had put forward the thesis that the Anglo-Saxon name for the month of April, Eostur-monath, was named after a goddess Eostre.

Wiccan festival
Ostara is one of the four lesser Wiccan holidays or sabbats of the Wheel of the Wheel of the yearYear. Ostara is celebrated on the spring equinox, in the Northern hemisphere around March 21 and in the Southern hemisphere around September 23, depending upon the specific timing of the equinox. Among the Wiccan sabbats, it is preceded by Imbolc and followed by Beltane.

In the book Eight Sabbats for Witches by Janet and Stewart Farrar, the festival Ostara is characterized by the rejoining of the Mother Goddess and her lover-consort-son, who spent the winter months in death. Other variations include the young God regaining strength in his youth after being born at Yule, and the Goddess returning to her Maiden aspect.

Ostara is the virgin Goddess of spring. This holiday concerns the deity's trip to the underworld, and their struggle to return from the Land of the Dead to Earth. When they accomplish this return, they have a life renewed. It was considered bad luck to wear anything new before Ostara, so the people would work through the winter in secret to make elegant clothes for the Sabbat celebration. The entire community would gather for games, feasting, and religious rituals while showing off their clothing.

The lamb was another symbol of Ostara, and was sacred to the Virgin Goddess of Europe, the Middle East, and North Africa.

The modern belief that eggs are delivered by a rabbit known as the Easter Bunny comes from the legend of the Goddess Eostre. So much did a lowly rabbit want to please the Goddess that he laid the sacred eggs in her honor, gaily decorated them, and humbly presented them to her. So pleased was she that she wished all humankind to share in her joy. In honor of her wishes, the rabbit went through the entire world and distributed these little decorated gifts of life.

References
^ Grimm, Jacob (1835). Deutsche Mythologie (German Mythology); From English released version Grimm's Teutonic Mythology (1888); Available online by Northvegr © 2004-2007, Chapter 13, page 10+

*Wikipedia

Blessed Be!

Cinosam "AnkhIwiEmHotep"
Life and Peace be with You --Cinosam

Bing & Ruth - The How of it Sped

The Shelf Life of Meat and Other Frozen Foods

By Erin Huffstetler, from TheBalance.com
frozen food
Freezing food will prevent it from going bad, but what is the optimum shelf life for frozen meats, veggies, fruits and other common foods? To avoid freezer burn and a general decline in quality, aim to buy only as much food as you can use in a reasonable amount of time. What's reasonable? It depends on the food. Read below for more details.

The Shelf Life of Frozen Meat

Depending on the type of meat you're freezing, it can last anywhere from one month to one year.

(Click) below for specifics. No matter the duration, you'll want to package your meat well. As a general rule, if you're planning to use it within a couple of months, simply place the meat in the freezer in its original packaging. If you are planning to freeze it for longer than a couple of months, you'll want to wrap it in another layer of aluminum foil or freezer paper or place the original contents in a sturdy zippered plastic bag. In either case, be sure to label the package as to its contents and the date it was frozen.

Click here to read the article at TheBalance.com

Sunday, March 19, 2017

Chuck Berry, Rock 'n' Roll Pioneer, Dies at 90

Chuck Berry, Rock 'n' Roll Pioneer, Dies at 90
Hillel Italie and Jim Suhr/AP

(NEW YORK) — Chuck Berry, rock 'n' roll's founding guitar hero and storyteller who defined the music's joy and rebellion in such classics as "Johnny B. Goode," ''Sweet Little Sixteen" and "Roll Over Beethoven," died Saturday at his home in an unincorporated area west of St. Louis. He was 90.

Emergency responders summoned to Berry's residence by his caretaker about 12:40 p.m. found him unresponsive, police in Missouri's St. Charles County said in a statement. Attempts to revive Berry failed, and he was pronounced shortly before 1:30 p.m., police said.

A police spokeswoman, Val Joyner, told The Associated Press she had no additional details about the death of Berry, calling him "really a legend."

Berry's core repertoire was some three dozen songs, his influence incalculable, from the Beatles and the Rolling Stones to virtually any group from garage band to arena act that called itself rock 'n roll. While Elvis Presley gave rock its libidinous, hip-shaking image, Berry was the auteur, setting the template for a new sound and way of life. Well before the rise of Bob Dylan, Berry wedded social commentary to the beat and rush of popular music.

"He was singing good lyrics, and intelligent lyrics, in the '50s when people were singing, "Oh, baby, I love you so,'" John Lennon once observed.

Berry, in his late 20s before his first major hit, crafted lyrics that spoke to the teenagers of the day and remained fresh decades later. "Sweet Little Sixteen" captured rock 'n' roll fandom, an early and innocent ode to the young girls later known as "groupies." ''School Day" told of the sing-song trials of the classroom ("American history and practical math; you're studying hard, hoping to pass...") and the liberation of rock 'n' roll once the day's final bell rang.

"Roll Over Beethoven" was an anthem to rock's history-making power, while "Rock and Roll Music" was a guidebook for all bands that followed ("It's got a back beat, you can't lose it"). "Back in the U.S.A." was a black man's straight-faced tribute to his country at a time there was no guarantee Berry would be served at the drive-ins and corner cafes he was celebrating.

"Everything I wrote about wasn't about me, but about the people listening," he once said.

"Johnny B. Goode," the tale of a guitar-playing country boy whose mother tells him he'll be a star, was Berry's signature song, the archetypal narrative for would-be rockers and among the most ecstatic recordings in the music's history. Berry can hardly contain himself as the words hurry out ("Deep down Louisiana close to New Orleans/Way back up in the woods among the evergreens") and the downpour of guitar, drums and keyboards amplifies every call of "Go, Johnny Go!"

The song was inspired in part by Johnnie Johnson, the boogie-woogie piano master who collaborated on many Berry hits, but the story could have easily been Berry's, Presley's or countless others'. Commercial calculation made the song universal: Berry had meant to call Johnny a "colored boy," but changed "colored" to "country," enabling not only radio play, but musicians of any color to imagine themselves as stars.

"Chances are you have talent," Berry later wrote of the song. "But will the name and the light come to you? No! You have to go!"

more at TimeEntertainment.com

SCIENTISTS FIND METAL IN RAT CAGES CAUSES CANCER IN LABORATORY RATS- ALL SCIENTIFIC DATA UP UNTIL NOW WORTHLESS

Get in a Skinner box? No way!
(Baltimore) -- Scientists at the National Institute of Health confirmed today that the metal in rat cages does indeed cause cancer in laboratory animals.

At a mid-afternoon NIH press conference Dr. Ronald Jam reflected the sentiment of his beleaguered colleagues. "Apparently by brushing up against the cages the little bastards contact cancer of all types. We thought about everything…we just never thought about the cages. I mean, this was a lot of work, and now it's all gone, just like that. Twenty-three years, two ex-wives, and five kids who wont talk to me? And for what? To start all over again? My whole life's down the crapper." At that point Dr. Jam broke into a low resonating howl of utter frustration and was led away from the briefing by an unidentified member of the nursing staff.

"Yeah, this could be a problem with the research data alright," said Dr. Erwin Burnbaum, Director of The Foundation for All Scientific Data. "Sure didn't see this one coming. Nope." Burnbaum confirmed that all scientific data up until now was rendered worthless by the recent findings.

*Creeping tabloidism online newspaper satire...The Newz.com

N.S. church packed as 'Momma' leaves behind 178 great-grandkids

“Momma” who left behind more than 300 direct descendants
“Momma” who left behind more than 300 direct descendants
CTVNews.ca Staff

t was a packed house at a Baptist church in rural Nova Scotia on Saturday, as family and friends gathered to say goodbye to a woman called “Momma” who left behind more than 300 direct descendants.

Gracie Mae Glasgow died Monday in North Preston, N.S., at age 97. She left behind 14 children, 78 grandchildren, 178 great-grandchildren and 59 great-great grandchildren
During a celebration of life held Saturday at the Saint Thomas United Baptist Church, family told stories about Glasgow, including about how she insisted that everyone call her Momma but no one call her grandmother.

Roletta Wohlgeschaffea, one of her daughters, said that her ever-growing family meant her father found himself frequently renovating the family home.
Wohlgeschaffea added that her mother had worked hard to make sure there was enough money to go around. She recalled her making wreaths and picking blueberries, which she would send her children out to sell door-to-door.

Misty McConico, one of Glasgow’s many granddaughters, said ‘Momma’ encouraged her kin to get involved at church, whether it was attending picnics or choir. McConico recalled that Momma “always had me singing.”

The Dysfunctional Section of a Hallmark Store

Card 1. I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now that you've come into my life...
(Inside card) -I've changed my mind.

Card 2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life....
(Inside card) -I never believed in Hell until I met you.

Card 3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....
(Inside card) -That you're not here to ruin it for me.

Card 4. Congratulations on your wedding day!...
(Inside card) -Too bad no one likes your husband.

Card 5. Someday I hope to marry...
(Inside card) -Someone other than you.

Card 6. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....
(Inside card) -Almost lifelike!

Card 7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me...
(Inside card) -Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.

Card 8. We've been friends for a very long time...
(Inside card) -What do you say we stop?

Card 9. I'm so miserable without you...
(Inside card) -It's almost like you're still here.

Card 10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy....
(Inside card) -Did you ever find out who the father was?

Card 11. You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket...
(Inside card) -I'd miss you terribly and think of you often.

Card 12. Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad! (Available only in Arkansas, Alabama, Mississippi, and West Virginia.)

Card 13. Looking back over the years we've been together, I can't help but wonder...
(Inside card) -What was I thinking?

Saturday, March 18, 2017

TRUTHS

truths
GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE, THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:


1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge . . .mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.

SUCCESS:

At age 4 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 16 success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 20 success is . . . having sex.
At age 35 success is . . . having money.
At age 50 success is . . . having money.
At age 60 success is . . . having sex.
At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is . . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your pants.

Would you like Fries with that?

Where's the beef?


It's at a Pennsylvania pub that serves the world's biggest burger 
- weighing in at NINE lip-smacking pounds!

9 pound burger!
That's no whopper - you can actually get this meat monster for $23.95 USD, 
loaded with all the fixins

9 pound burger!
- Two whole tomatoes
- a half-head of lettuce
- 12 slices of American cheese
- a full cup of peppers
- two entire onions
- plus, a river of mayonnaise, ketchup, and mustard.
9 pound burger!

9 pound burger!

Anyone up for seconds??

Prison VS. Work

Prison or Work? Are you in prison or at work?

Just in case you ever got the two mixed up. This should make things a bit clearer.

IN PRISON.. you spend the majority of your time in an 8x10 cell.
AT WORK... you spend the majority of your time in a 6x8 cubicle.

IN PRISON... you get three meals a day.
AT WORK... you only get a break for one meal and you pay for it.

IN PRISON... you get time off for good behavior.
AT WORK... you get more work for good behavior.

IN PRISON... the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.
AT WORK... you must carry around a security card and open all the doors for yourself.

IN PRISON... you can watch TV and play games.
AT WORK... you get fired for watching TV and playing games.

IN PRISON... you get your own toilet.
AT WORK... you have to share with some idiot who pees on the seat.

IN PRISON... they allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK... you can't even speak to your family.

IN PRISON... the taxpayers pay all expenses with no work required.
AT WORK... you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners.

IN PRISON... you spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out.
AT WORK... you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.

IN PRISON... you must deal with sadistic wardens.
AT WORK... they are called managers

Have a Great Day at WORK !!

THE INCREDIBLE NON EDIBLE EGG

Incredible what they can do with an eggshell and a laser beam.

Egg Shell created by a laserEgg Shell created by a laser

Egg Shell created by a laserEgg Shell created by a laser

Egg Shell created by a laserEgg Shell created by a laser
Egg Shell created by a laser

REMEMBER - THIS IS DONE FROM ONE EGG SHELL!

Friday, March 17, 2017

Happy St. Patrick's Day From Sean

Happy St. Patrick's Day From Sean Click here

Click above for more of Sean

Irish Toasts

  • May your pockets be heavy and your heart be light, may good luck pursue you each morning and night.
  • May the roof above us never fall in, and may we friends gathered below never fall out.
  • A trout in the pot is better than a salmon in the sea.
  • As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point in the wrong direction.
  • A friend's eye is a good mirror.
  • May you live as long as you want, and never want as long as you live.
  • He who loses money, loses much; He who loses a friend, loses more; He who loses faith, loses all.
  • May the Lord keep you in His hand and never close His fist too tight.
  • May your neighbors respect you, trouble neglect you, the angels protect you, and heaven accept you.
  • May the sound of happy music, and the lilt of Irish laughter, fill your heart with gladness, that stays forever after.
  • May the hinges of our friendship never grow rusty. And our ale never turn musty.
  • St. Patrick's Day is an enchanted time -- a day to begin transforming winter's dreams into summer's magic.
  • "Maybe it's bred in the bone, but the sound of pipes is a little bit of heaven to some of us." ~ Nancy O'Keefe
  • "There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting." ~ John Millington Synge

The 411 - Special Edition - Saint Patrick

St. PatrickSaint Patrick (Latin: Patricius, Irish: Naomh Pádraig) was a Christian missionary and is the patron saint of Ireland along with Brigid of Kildare and Columba. Patrick was born in Roman Britain. When he was about sixteen he was captured by Irish raiders and taken as a slave to Ireland, where he lived for six years before escaping and returning to his family. He entered the church, as his father and grandfather had before him, becoming a deacon and a bishop. He later returned to Ireland as a missionary, working in the north and west of the island, but little is known about the places where he actually worked and no link can be made with Patrick and any church. By the eighth century he had become the patron saint of Ireland, mostly owing to clever propaganda by the monastery of Armagh which claimed to hold his relics. The Irish monastery system evolved after the time of Patrick and the Irish church did not develop the diocesan model that Patrick and the other early missionaries had tried to establish.

411 The available evidence does not allow the dates of Patrick's life to be fixed with certainty, but it appears that he was active as a missionary in Ireland during the second half of the fifth century. Two letters from him survive, along with later hagiographies from the seventh century onwards. Many of these works cannot be taken as authentic traditions. Uncritical acceptance of the Annals of Ulster (see below) would imply that he lived from 373 to 493, and ministered in northern Ireland from 433 onwards.

Most modern studies of Saint Patrick follow a variant of T. F. O'Rahilly's "Two Patricks" theory. That is to say, many of the traditions later attached to Saint Patrick originally concerned Palladius, a deacon from Gaul who came to Ireland, perhaps sent by Pope Celestine I (died 431). Palladius was not the only early cleric in Ireland at this time. Saints Auxilius, Secundus and Iserninus are associated with early churches in Munster and Leinster. By this reading, Palladius was active in Ireland until the 460s.

411 Prosper of Aquitaine's contemporary chronicle states:

Palladius was ordained by Pope Celestine and sent to the Irish believers in Christ as their first bishop.

Prosper associates this with the visits of Germanus of Auxerre to Britain to St. Patricksuppress the Pelagian heresy and it has been suggested that Palladius and his colleagues were sent to Ireland to ensure that exiled Pelagians did not establish themselves among the Irish Christians. The appointment of Palladius and his fellow-bishops was not obviously a mission to convert the Irish, but more probably intended to minister to existing Christian communities in Ireland. The sites of churches associated with Palladius and his colleagues are close to royal centres of the period: Secundus is remembered by Dunshaughlin, County Meath, close to the Hill of Tara which is associated with the High King of Ireland; Kilashee, County Kildare, close to Naas with links with the Kings of Leinster, is probably named for Auxilius. This activity was limited to the southern half of Ireland, and there is no evidence for them in Ulster or Connacht.

Although the evidence for contacts with Gaul is clear, the borrowings from Latin into the Old Irish language show that links with former Roman Britain were many. Saint Iserninus, who appears to be of the generation of Palladius, is thought to have been a Briton, and is associated with the lands of the Uí Cheinnselaig in Leinster. The Palladian mission should not be contrasted with later "British" missions, but forms a part of them.

411 Patrick in his own words
Two Latin letters survive which are generally accepted to have been written by Patrick. These are the Declaration (Latin: Confessio) and the Letter to the soldiers of Coroticus (Latin: Epistola). The Declaration is the more important of the two. In it Patrick gives a short account of his life and his mission.

Patrick was born at Banna Venta Berniae, Calpornius his father was a deacon, his grandfather Potitus a priest. When he was about sixteen, he was captured and carried off as a slave to Ireland. Patrick worked as a herdsman, remaining a captive for six years. He writes that his faith grew in captivity, and that he prayed daily. After six years he heard a voice telling him that he would soon go home, and then that his ship was ready. Fleeing his master, he travelled to a port, two hundred miles away he says, where he found a ship and, after various adventures, returned home to his family, now in his early twenties.

411 Patrick recounts that he had a vision a few years after returning home:

I saw a man coming, as it were from Ireland. His name was Victoricus, and he carried many letters, and he gave me one of them. I read the heading: "The Voice of the Irish". As I began the letter, I imagined in that moment that I heard the voice of those very people who were near the wood of Foclut, which is beside the western sea—and they cried out, as with one voice: "We appeal to you, holy servant boy, to come and walk among us.

Much of the Declaration concerns charges made against Patrick by his fellow Christians at a trial. What these charges were, he does not say explicitly, but he writes that he returned the gifts which wealthy women gave him, did not accept payment for baptisms, nor for ordaining priests, and indeed paid for many gifts to kings and judges, and paid for the sons of chiefs to accompany him. It is concluded, therefore, that he was accused of some sort of financial impropriety, and perhaps of having obtained his bishopric in Ireland with personal gain in mind.

411 From this same evidence, something can be seen of Patrick's mission. He writes that he "baptised thousands of people". He ordained priests to lead the new Christian communities. He converted wealthy women, some of whom became nuns in the face of family opposition. He also dealt with the sons of kings, converting them too.

Patrick's position as a foreigner in Ireland was not an easy one. His refusal to accept gifts from kings placed him outside the normal ties of kinship, fosterage and affinity. Legally he was without protection, and he says that he was on one occasion beaten, robbed of all he had, and put in chains, perhaps awaiting execution.

411 Murchiú's life of Saint Patrick contains a supposed prophecy by the druids which gives an impression of how Patrick and other Christian missionaries were seen by those hostile to them:

Across the sea will come Adze-head, crazed in the head,
his cloak with hole for the head, his stick bent in the head.
He will chant impieties from a table in the front of his house;
all his people will answer: "so be it, so be it."


411 The second piece of evidence from Patrick's life is the Letter to Coroticus or Letter to the Soldiers of Coroticus. In this, Patrick writes an open letter announcing that he has excommunicated certain British soldiers of Coroticus who have raided in Ireland, along with Picts and Irishmen, taking some of Patrick's converts into slavery. Coroticus, based largely on an 8th century gloss , is taken to be King Ceretic of Alt Clut. It has been suggested that it was the sending of this letter which provoked the trial which Patrick mentions in the Confession.

Dating Patrick's life and mission
According to the latest reconstruction of the old Irish annals, Patrick died in AD 493, a date accepted by some modern historians. Prior to the 1940s it was believed without doubt that he died in 461 and thus had lived in the first half of the 5th century. A lecture entitled "The Two Patricks", published in 1942 by T. F. O'Rahilly, caused enormous controversy by proposing that there had been two "Patricks", Palladius and Patrick, and that what we now know of St. Patrick was in fact in part a conscious effort to meld the two into one hagiographic personality. Decades of contention eventually ended with most historians now asserting that Patrick was indeed most likely to have been active in the mid-to-late 5th century.

While Patrick's own writings contain no dates, they do contain information which can be used to date them. Patrick's quotations from the Acts of the Apostles follow the Vulgate, strongly suggesting that his ecclesiastical conversion did not take place before the early fifth century. Patrick also refers to the Franks as being pagan. Their conversion is dated to the period 496–508.

411 The compiler of the Annals of Ulster stated that in the year 553:

I have found this in the Book of Cuanu: The relics of Patrick were placed sixty years after his death in a shrine by Colum Cille. Three splendid halidoms were found in the burial-place: his goblet, the Angel's Gospel, and the Bell of the Testament. This is how the angel distributed the halidoms: the goblet to Dún, the Bell of the Testament to Ard Macha, and the Angel's Gospel to Colum Cille himself. The reason it is called the Angel's Gospel is that Colum Cille received it from the hand of the angel.

The reputed burial place of St. Patrick in Downpatrick
The placing of this event in the year 553 would certainly seem to place Patrick's death in 493, or at least in the early years of that decade, and indeed the Annals of Ulster report in 493:

Patrick, arch-apostle, or archbishop and apostle of the Irish, rested on the 16th of the Kalends of April in the 120th year of his age, in the 60th year after he had come to Ireland to baptize the Irish.

There is also the additional evidence of his disciple, Mochta, who died in 535.

411 St. Patrick is said to be buried under Down Cathedral in Downpatrick, County Down alongside St. Brigid and St. Columba, although this has never been proven. The Battle for the Body of St. Patrick demonstrates the importance of both him as a spiritual leader, and of his body as an object of veneration, in early Christian Ireland.

St. PatrickEarly traditions
An early document which is silent concerning Patrick is the letter of Columbanus to Pope Boniface IV of about 613. Columbanus writes that Ireland's Christianity "was first handed to us by you, the successors of the holy apostles", apparently referring to Palladius only, and ignoring Patrick. Writing on the Easter controversy in 632 or 633, Cummian—it is uncertain whether this is the Cummian associated with Clonfert or Cumméne of Iona— does refer to Patrick, calling him our papa, that is pope or primate.

Two works by early hagiographers of Patrick have survived. These are the writings of Tirechan, and of Muirchu moccu Machtheni. Both writers relied upon an earlier work, now lost, the Book of Ultán. This Ultán, probably the same person as Ultan of Ardbraccan, was Tirechan's foster-father. His obituary is given in the Annals of Ulster under the year 657. These works thus date from a century and a half after Patrick's death.

Tirechan writes

"I found four names for Patrick written in the book of Ultán, bishop of the tribe of Conchobar: holy Magonus (that is, "famous"); Succetus (that is, the god of war); Patricius (that is, father of the citizens); Cothirtiacus (because he served four houses of druids)."

Muirchu records much the same information, adding that "[h]is mother was named Concessa."

411 The Patrick portrayed by Tirechan and Muirchu is a martial figure, who contests with druids, overthrows pagan idols, and curses kings and kingdoms. On occasions their accounts contradict Patrick's own writings: Tirechan states that Patrick accepted gifts from female converts although Patrick himself flatly denies this. However, the emphasis Tirechan and Muirchu placed on female converts, and in particular royal and noble women who became nuns, is thought to be a genuine insight into Patrick's work of conversion. Patrick also worked with the unfree and the poor, encouraging them to vows of monastic chastity. Tirechan's account suggests that many early Patrician churches were combined with nunneries founded by Patrick's noble female converts.

The martial Patrick found in Tirechan and Muirchu, and in later accounts, echoes similar figures found during the conversion of the Roman Empire to Christianity. It may be doubted whether such accounts are an accurate representation of Patrick's time, although such violent events may well have occurred as Christians gained in strength and numbers.

Much of the detail supplied by Tirechan and Muirchu, in particular the churches established by Patrick, and the monasteries founded by his converts, may relate to the situation in the seventh century, when the churches which claimed ties to Patrick, and in particular Armagh, were expanding their influence throughout Ireland in competition with the church of Kildare. In the same period, Wilfred, Archbishop of York, claimed to speak, as metropolitan archbishop, "for all the northern part of Britain and of Ireland" at a council held in Rome in the time of Pope Agatho, thus claiming jurisdiction over the Irish church.

Other presumed early materials include the Irish annals, which contain records from the Chronicle of Ireland. These sources have conflated Palladius and Patrick. Another early document is the so-called First Synod of Saint Patrick. This is a seventh century document, once, but no longer, taken as to contain a fifth century original text. It apparently collects the results of several early synods, and represents an era when pagans were still a major force in Ireland. The introduction attributes it to Patrick, Auxilius, and Iserninus, a claim which "cannot be taken at face value".

411 Patrick in legend

The Shamrock Pious legend credits Patrick with banishing snakes from the island, though post-glacial Ireland never actually had snakes; one suggestion is that snakes referred to the serpent symbolism of the Druids of that time and place, as shown for instance on coins minted in Gaul (see Carnutes), or that it could have referred to beliefs such as Pelagianism, symbolized as “serpents”. Legend also credits Patrick with teaching the Irish about the concept of the Trinity by showing people the Shamrock or Irish Clovershamrock, a 3-leaved clover, using it to highlight the Christian belief of 'three divine persons in the one God' (as opposed to the Arian belief that was popular in Patrick's time). Whether or not these legends are true, the very fact that there are so many legends about Patrick shows how important his ministry was to Ireland. Some Irish legends involve the Oilliphéist, the Caoránach, and the Copóg Phádraig.

The 12th century work Acallam na Senórach tells of Patrick being met by two ancient warriors, Caílte mac Rónáin and Oisín, during his evangelical travels. The two were once members of Fionn mac Cumhaill's warrior band the Fianna, and somehow survived to Patrick's time. They travel with the saint and tell him their stories.

411 Sainthood and Remembrance
March 17, popularly known as St. Patrick's Day, is believed to be his death date (according to the Encyclopedia Britannica) and is the date celebrated as his feast day. The day became a feast day in the universal church due to the influence of the Waterford-born Franciscan scholar Luke Wadding, as a member of the commission for the reform of the Breviary in the early part of the 17th century.

For most of Christianity's first thousand years, canonisations were done on the diocesan or regional level. Relatively soon after the death of people considered to be very holy people, the local Church affirmed that they could be liturgically celebrated as saints. As a result, St. Patrick has never been formally canonised by a Pope, but he is still widely venerated in Ireland and elsewhere today.

St. Patrick is also venerated in the Orthodox Church, especially among English-speaking Orthodox Christians living in the United Kingdom and Ireland and in North America. There are even Orthodox icons dedicated to him.

*From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
And you thought is was a bunch 'o blarney!, hehe