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Wednesday, February 28, 2007

The Safest Place in Canada


Think about it, have you ever heard of one of these being robbed?

Tim Horton's Coppee Shop

Tim Horton's Coppee Shop

*Thanks, Auntie `M`

Superman Returns(TM): Stop! Press! Game


Superman Returns - Click here
*Thanks, Daryn

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...


STUPID is as STUPID Says!

ON YOU SHOULD HAVE DINED IN



Take-out order taker: May I have your name please?
Customer: Bill.
Order taker: John?
Customer: No, Bill.
Order taker: Dion?
Customer: Bill.
Order taker: Jill?
Customer: No, Bill. Do you know Bill Clinton?
Order taker: Yes.
Customer: My name is Bill, like in Bill Clinton.
Order taker: Okay, Dill Clinton. May I take your order, Sir Dill?

--exchange on the phone at a Manila take-out restaurant


TRUE or FALSE?


True or False?


Blondes have more hair than redheads do.







TRUE! Though it’s incredibly difficult to count the hairs on anyone’s head, counting blonde hair would definitely take longer. While people with black hair have about 107,000 strands and brunettes about 110,000, blondes have as many as 140,000 strands. Redheads have the least amount, with only about 90,000.



Blondes vs Redheads

Makes ya wonder...


.... If someone with multiple personalities threatens to commit suicide, is that considered a hostage crisis?

HYUK!


Things That Will Never Be The Same After Brokeback Mountain...


Things That Will Never Be The Same After Brokeback Mountain...

Click on the image for a larger view.

*Thanks, Bill

This is really weird


Try the following:


How Smart Is Your Right Foot?

How Smart Is Your Right Foot?This is so funny that it will boggle your mind. And, you will keep trying it at least 50 more times to see if you can out-smart your foot. But you can't!!

1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles with it.

2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.. Your foot will change direction!!!

I told you so.. And there is nothing you can do about it.

*Thanks, Auntie 'M'

O-M-G!


O-M-G!
*Thanks, Bill!

A body builder and Blonde


A body builder takes off his shirt and the blonde says, "What a great chest you have."

He tells her, "That's 100 lbs. of dynamite, baby."

He takes off his pants and the blonde says, "What massive calves you have."

The bodybuilder tells her, "That's 100 lbs. of dynamite, baby."

He then removes his underwear and the blonde goes running out of the apartment screaming in fear. The body builder puts his clothes back on and chases after her. He catches up to her and asks why she ran out of the apartment like that.

The blonde replies, "I was afraid to be around all that dynamite when I saw how short the fuse was."


*Thanks, Daryn

Some of my answers.....


Click on the picture for a larger image

Math
Proton
Ramp
Cat
Curve
Expand
Find X
Heat
*Thanks, Andy

TROY - The Latest Strip


Click Above Then choose 'Current Strip'

Click Above Then choose 'Current Strip'.

Monday, February 26, 2007

RAGE - The Gay Crusader


RAGE, The Gay Crusader
Click on the picture to read all about it!

Either use your 'Back' button to return to 'OZ' or click on the links at the bottom of the pages.

TAROT - The MOON


The Moon


It has long been said that the full Moon has a powerful effect on our emotional state, creating tides of emotions within us...


When we experience such turbulent emotions, it is difficult to believe that we could ever feel harmony and peace within ourselves again.

Highly charged feelings cause havoc in our lives, and when The Moon appears in your readings, you can be sure there are issues in your life that are causing confusion and mixed emotions.

When this card appears, it is suggesting you take a step back and view your situation from a different perspective and with a calmer logic.

However, The Moon does represent powerful feelings and it isn’t always easy to gain clarity: we often can’t ‘see the wood for the trees’. The path to clarity and understanding is a challenging one, yet despite the emotional wrenches you may feel, it is right for you.

For example, if you are in a situation where you need to let go of a lover or partner for whatever reason, but emotionally cannot summon up the courage to do so, even though you know it’s the right thing to do, trust that the new path you seek is right for you.

Often when a decision is very difficult and causes strong emotional resistance within us, we allow our weaker nature to rule. However, in many of these situations it is a brave heart and clear mind that help us see through the fog of unruly emotion and step onto our true path.

The Moon not only represents illusion caused by powerful emotions, but also illusion or trickery created by other people’s lies or misleading behavior. Therefore, when The Moon appears in a reading, it’s a good idea to question your motives and those of people close to you, and it is best to refrain from making firm decisions until you know and feel a sense of certainty about your choices.

The wan light of The Moon does in some way shed light upon the right path for us, but because we cannot see clearly in dim light we doubt ourselves and hold back from taking the steps forward.

The Moon may suggest that your avoidance to take action or make a tough decision about a certain situation is simply due to fear of loss. Fear has much to do with The Moon, and courage is always needed to conquer fear, so take your time when The Moon appears in your readings and search for your inner courage. With patience you will find the clarity you seek.

Cinosam "AnkhIwiEmHotep"
Life and Peace be with You --Cinosam

Well...GOSH!


Mickey Mouse

DID YOU KNOW?

Mickey Mouse is called "Musse Pigg" in Sweden, while Huey, Dewey, and Louie are known as "Knatte, Fnatte, och Tjatte!"


News of the Weird


Click here for Chuck Shepherd's

Brain Cramps


Brain Cramps - Click here

Click Above.

The Wiz On The Street


Prince Harry, the son of Prince Charles and Lady Diana, third in line to the throne of England, is being deployed to Iraq. So the Wizard hit the streets again, asking, "What do you think?"

Arthur LockeArthur Locke,
Brewer
"Queen Elizabeth did well as a machine-gunner during World War II, so I wouldn't expect any less of her grandson."

Mary SawyerMary Sawyer,
Systems Analyst
"Man, Iraqi phone lines are going to be inundated with prank callers asking if they have Prince Harry in a tank."

Chuck HurleyChuck Hurley,
Hair Stylist
"Great. Another kid with maternal-abandonment issues and a gun."


*American Voices, The Onion

Oscars: Departed Best Picture, Mirren & Whitaker Best Actors, Etheridge Best Song


Ellen Degeneres was host to the 79th Academy Awards(Hollywood, California) Mob epic "The Departed" won the Academy Award for best picture Sunday. It's director, Martin Scorsese was named best director. It was his first win after five previous losses.

Helen Mirren won the best actress Academy Award Sunday night for her role in "The Queen."

Forest Whitaker took the best-actor Academy Award for "The Last King of Scotland," playing Ugandan dictator Idi Amin.

Jennifer Hudson won the supporting-actress Academy Award for "Dreamgirls," her first film role.

Her costar, Eddie Murphy, lost the supporting-actor prize to Alan Arkin of "Little Miss Sunshine."

"An Inconvenient Truth," a chronicle of Al Gore's campaign to warn the world about global warming, was picked as best documentary.

Melissa Etheridge won the Oscar for best-song for the anthem "I Need to Wake Up" from the film.

"First I want to thank my wife Tammy," the lesbian singer said, referring to her spouse Tammy Lynn Michaels.

Ethridge beat out three songs featured in "Dreamgirls" and one from the movie "Cars."

Composer Gustavo Santaolalla won his second straight Oscar for original score for "Babel." He won the same prize a year ago for "Brokeback Mountain."

"Little Miss Sunshine," which leapt from low-budget indie to become a commercial hit won the original screenplay Oscar for first-time screenwriter Michael Arndt.

Ellen DeGeneres served as a noble ringleader for the ceremonies. Her opening monologue was as distinctly low key as her pant suit. DeGeneres noted the broad scope - internationally, racially and sexually - of this year's nominees.

"Such diversity in the room in a year where there's been so many negative things said about people's race, religion and sexual orientation," said DeGeneres.

"And I want to put this out there: If there weren't blacks, Jews or gays, there would be no Oscars.

"Or anyone named Oscar, when you think about that," she said.


*365Gay.com

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...


STUPID is as STUPID Says!

ON STRAWS, MORE REWARDING THAN YOU EVER DREAMED!

"FRESH!!"

"Let’s try homeparty fashionably and have a joyful chat with nice fellow.

Fujinami’s straw will produce you young party happily and exceedingly.

Flexible straws which we can bend freely are very convenient for us."


--slogans on the box of Fresh flexible straws, Japan

Joke of the Day


Joke of the Day - Click here

Click Above.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

From The Emerald City


The Wizard Wants YOU!

The Wizard wants YOU! I need new material for 'OZ' and I am looking for my readers input! You too can be published on 'OZ' - The 'Other' Side of the Rainbow!

Send your jokes, stories, catoons etc to me by clicking on my picture at the top left corner of 'OZ'. I always provide credit unless told otherwise. Due to the volume of submissions, material may not be published the day they are submitted and due to constraints of Blogger, The Wizard reserves the right to edit submitted material, change picture sizes etc, while maintaining the quality of the submitted material. For non-original materials, please quote the source of the material.


Yours,

--The Wizard


Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness


Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

Crabby Road - Maxine on the Wilderness

*Thanks, Auntie 'M'

Hats of Meat


Exactly like it sounds....

Hats of Meat - click here

Museum of Food Anomalies


See what's lurking in YOUR Honeycombs and more!

Evil Honeycomb
*MOFA

Tall Tale


Just last week, when neighborhood poets dressed as their favorite fruit pies, the person who discovered that Thomas Edison was afraid of the dark, squeezed the toothpaste so quickly that all the stripes fell off, and correctly predicted the winners of the next three Super Bowls. That is the strange tale of why you should not believe everything you read.

Created using Lionel's "Tall Tale" generator.

Monkey Cloning


Did you hear about the disaster at a major Canadian University?

A team of scientists were cloning monkeys and one of them blew up.

The researchers are now trying to determine what went wrong by sifting through the Rhesus' pieces.


TRUE or FALSE


True or False?


A Golgi body is a greenish cluster of stars.





FALSE! Along with mitochondria, endoplasmic reticulum, vesicles, and the nucleus, a Golgi body is part of a cell. The Golgi body is responsible for modifying and shipping proteins and lipids for the cell to either use or discharge. Also called the Golgi apparatus, it is named after Camillo Golgi, an Italian cytologist (scientist who studies cells) who won the 1906 Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine.


Nice Gogli on your t-shirt!
Nice Gogli on your t-shirt!

Stupid Is As Stupid Says...


STUPID is as STUPID Says!

ON MAKING THINGS EXCESSIVELY CLEAR
"We’ve said it previously and we’ve said it before."


--soccer coach Colin Hendry

The Three Little Pigs

Three Little Pigs went out to dinner one night. The waiter came and took their drink order.

"I would like a Sprite," said the first little piggy.

"I would like a Coke," said the second little piggy.

"I want beer, lots and lots of beer," said the third little piggy.

The drinks were brought out and the waiter took their orders for dinner.

"I want a nice big steak," said the first piggy.

"I would like the salad plate," said the second piggy.

"I want beer, lots and lots of beer," said the third little piggy.

The meals were brought out and a while later the waiter approached the table and asked if the piggies would like any dessert.

"I want a banana split," said the first piggy.

"I want a cheesecake," said the second piggy.

"I want beer, lots and lots of beer," exclaimed the third little piggy.

"Pardon me for asking," said the waiter to the third little piggy,"

But why have you only ordered beer all evening?"



Animated Beer



The third piggy says -



"Well, somebody has to go wee, wee, all the way home!


*Thanks, Auntie 'M'